


morality briefs

by thunderylee



Category: NewS (Band)
Genre: Canon Universe, Future Fic, Gen, discussion of rape and abortion in a court setting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-08-30
Updated: 2008-08-30
Packaged: 2019-02-05 03:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12785832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: Shige leaves NEWS to become a lawyer, and Koyama follows him.





	morality briefs

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.

> PART THE FIRST

Shige looks at his phone, then at the wall of the bathroom stall, staring unseeingly at what he thinks is Akanishi’s phone number.

“… What?” he says brilliantly.

“You passed,” the man on the other end repeats, sounding like he’s telling Shige how there are aliens in the room with him.

“A-are you sure?” Shige asks, reaching out his hand to the tile to hold himself up.

“Kato Shigeaki, year of the rabbit,” the man says with a chuckle. “With a unique name like yours, it’s impossible to be mistaken.”

“My score, then,” Shige tries again. His heart is threatening to beat out of his chest and all he needs is for this man to tell him he _failed_ , dammit.

“You passed,” the man says for the third time. “Only three percent of exam takers pass on the first try, and you are one of them. Congratulations.”

“A-ah,” Shige starts to choke, his entire life flashing before his eyes like this were the end. “What happens now?” he finally manages to voice.

The man actually laughs. “That’s up to you, kid. All I can tell you is that your certificate will be mailed to you within six weeks.”

“Th-thank you,” Shige says quickly, an afterthought. He hangs up the phone before he can _not_ say anything else.

It immediately rings again. Shige focuses on the display and brings it back to his ear. “Mom?”

“Shigeaki!” Shige-mama scolds, loud enough for Shige to flinch. “Why did I have to hear from a stuffy-sounding lawyer guy that you passed the bar?”

Shige gasps. “I just got off the phone with them! I was about to call you, I swear. Why were you talking to some stuffy-sounding lawyer guy?”

“They called for you,” his mother replies. “The phone has been ringing non-stop. Everyone wants the guy who passed the bar on his first try to work at their firm.”

“Work?” Shige repeats, more bewildered than before.

“Shigeaki, you have to come home and take care of this,” she says, a little sadly. “I can’t be taking messages for you all afternoon.”

“I-I have rehearsal,” Shige spits out, the concept of singing and dancing seeming so distant right now.

“Rehearsal?” Shige-mama squawks. “Baby, you’re a _lawyer_ now.”

Shige opens his mouth to reply, but nothing comes out. His mother’s words play over and over again in his mind as it occurs to him what he has to do.

“I’ll give you an hour,” she relents, “but after that they’ll just have to keep ringing.”

After flipping his cell shut, Shige slumps to the floor and hugs his knees, careless to the filth of the Jimusho bathroom and even more oblivious to the fact that he was supposed to be back ten minutes ago.

He has a tough decision to make.

::

“Shige, where the hell have you-” Ryo starts, falling silent as he sees the look on Shige’s face. “What happened and who do I have to beat up.”

“Shige?” Koyama screeches, falling across the room and knocking over Ryo to lift Shige’s chin to look at him. “Shige has a scary face.”

“Shige looks like he’s about to cry,” Massu observes from a safe distance away.

“Don’t cry, Shige!” says Tegoshi, sneaking between Ryo and Koyama to be in front. “No matter what it is, we still love you!”

Yamapi stands silently to the side, his expression unresponsive like he already knows what’s coming.

“I…” Shige begins, looking at all of them in turn, hating himself for what he’s about to say. “I passed.”

“What?” Koyama exclaims. “That’s great!”

“Don’t only three percent pass the first time?” Ryo asks incredulously.

“Amazing Shige!” Tegoshi squeals.

Shige nods and winces as Koyama’s arms wrap around him, then Tegoshi’s. “We’re so proud of you!” Koyama says into his shoulder, followed by his tears.

“Hey,” Yamapi says loudly, and Koyama and Tegoshi both jump back like they were burned. They clear the way for Yamapi to walk up to Shige, where he looks him dead in the eyes in a way that makes Shige tremble under the stare. “How long do I have.”

It’s a valid question, except that it’s not really a question and Shige knows that no matter how he answers, it won’t be right. “Um,” he mumbles. “My mom says that I’m already getting job offers…”

“Amazing!” Tegoshi shrieks again, clinging onto Koyama and bouncing with him since they can’t hug Shige anymore. “Shige is going to be a successful lawyer!”

“Stop it!” Yamapi yells, and everyone else falls still. “Do you have any idea what this means?”

“Shige can’t have his fauxhawk anymore?” Koyama offers.

Shige’s hand automatically flies to his hair and he frowns. He didn’t think of that.

“ _He won’t be in NewS anymore_ ,” Yamapi hisses through his teeth. “We’re going to be a five-person group.”

“What?” Tegoshi says. “Shige’s quitting NewS?”

Yamapi turns back to Shige. “How long.”

Shige wishes that the floor would swallow him up. “As soon as possible.”

“Fine, leave now.” Yamapi spins on his heel and faces the others. “We need to redo the formation for all of our songs and cover Shige’s parts until they’re rearranged. The choreography should be okay as it is.”

Koyama’s the only one not listening; he’s watching Shige as the latter slowly packs up his bag and trudges out the door.

::

“Ordinarily I wouldn’t let you out of it,” Johnny tells him, “but I got quite a nice offer from the firm that wants to hire you.” He shoves a pamphlet across his shiny desk to where Shige is standing awkwardly. “If you work for them, I’ll tear up your contract right here.”

“Criminal law?” Shige repeats, scanning the advert. “I want to be a prosecutor.”

“I wanted to be Prime Minister,” Johnny replies. “We don’t always get what we want.”

“How long do I have to work for them?” Shige asks.

Johnny puffs on his cigar. “A year.”

Shige considers spending an entire year defending dirtbag criminals and researching loopholes to help murderers get off. The thought alone makes him nauseous. “How much to break my contract and work for the district?”

“More than you can afford on a prosecutor’s salary,” Johnny says. “Don’t you know that criminal law is where the money is? You can charge retainers and commissions and make out _big_ , while the government is just going to pay you a salary no matter how many cases you win.”

“So I have no choice,” Shige mutters, folding his arms childishly. “I’m not even that good of a performer anymore. You should be paying them to take me away.”

Johnny laughs. “Do you honestly think this is about you?”

Shige frowns and reaches for a pen.

::

Two weeks into his new job, he’s buried in paperwork for six cases – all assists – and can see most of Tokyo from his high-rise office. He has his own private secretary who keeps asking if there’s _anything else_ he _needs_ with a wink and a flash of leg. The other lawyers are jealous of the barely-graduated twenty-five-year-old who passed the bar on his first try and talk shit on him around the water cooler, at least until one of the partners walks by.

He would feel alone if he wasn’t so damn busy. His mother has covered him with a blanket the past three nights because he’s fallen asleep at the table surrounded by law books. It’s not much different from when he was in school, only now he’s wearing a suit and tie and his hair is parted properly. Shige-mama feels like ten years have gone by since her son left Johnny’s, her feelings not disproved when Shige stumbles into the kitchen every morning, grumbles a “good morning,” and downs a cup of black coffee before running for the train and eventually – she hopes – opening his eyes.

::

It’s actually Shige’s father who hears of NewS’ fate, ironically enough from Koyama’s father when they meet by chance at lunch one day. The two men who barely seem to exist in their sons’ public lives are not exactly strangers, and they share worries over ramen about their respective boys.

When the bowls are empty, both men agree that it would be best if their sons didn’t know about the other’s troubles.

::

It’s not that he’s avoiding Koyama, it’s just that time goes by twice as fast when there are court dates coming up and there isn’t nearly enough time in a day to take a piss let alone return personal emails. Koyama continues mailing anyway, short little notes about what he had for lunch or something Tegoshi said, and Shige is very grateful for the ray of innocence in the midst of what he feels is a very dirty job.

The first time he helps a criminal get off on a technicality, he spends the afternoon in the courthouse bathroom throwing up what’s left of his morals. The lawyer he assisted buys him a beer and a lap dance, and there isn’t enough alcohol in Japan to make Shige forget what he’s become, what he gave up for this life.

He goes into work the next day only to be sent home – Kato-kun has worked hard, hasn’t he? He deserves a day off after three months in a row. Shige doesn’t know what to do with himself now that he can breathe without rushing; his feet carry him not to his house but Koyama’s, where he’s surprised to see Koyama in an apron with his hair tied up on top of his head, helping his mom run the shop.

Shige can’t quite think of why it’s odd – Koyama usually helps his mom when he has free time – but it has something to do with the snow outside and Christmas decorations and- “Kei, it’s New Year’s Eve!”

Koyama looks up, and Shige’s life is brightened just by the grin that forms on Koyama’s face. “Shige! Yes, yes it is!”

He glances at his mother with begging eyes, and she gestures for him to go as she takes over whatever he was doing. Koyama flails out into the dining area, flings his arms around Shige, and practically cries into his shoulder. “Did Shige come to spend New Year’s with me?”

“What about Countdown?” Shige asks in a small voice, fearing that he already knows the answer.

Koyama chuckles, pulling back enough to look at Shige apologetically. “NewS disbanded a little while after you left. Didn’t you hear about it?”

“What?!” Shige screeches, earning the attention of every patron in the shop. “What do you mean NewS disbanded? What happened to everybody?”

Cringing, Koyama bows in embarrassment to his customers and shoves Shige outside, shivering at the snow falling around him. “I can’t believe you didn’t hear. Did you really cut yourself off from the entire world?”

“I had cases -” Shige starts, then sighs and looks up at Koyama. “I’m sorry, this is all my fault.”

Koyama laughs. “It’s not like you were studying so hard for your health,” he says slowly. “We all knew it was going to happen someday. Just not so… soon.” He hugs his arms in lieu of an actual coat. “Tegoshi and Massu are doing their TegoMass thing, Ryo-chan’s only with Kanjani8 now, and Yamapi went solo.”

Shige stares at him in disbelief. “Why didn’t they just replace me with Toma or someone? You could still be NewS, just with someone else instead of me.”

“Because I quit too,” Koyama says firmly.

“What?!” Shige cries for the second time in five minutes. “Why?”

“I heard about the deal Johnny made with you,” Koyama answers, spitting out the words like they taste bad. “I couldn’t work for someone who would do that to you.”

Shige chooses his words carefully. “How did you get out of-”

“He let me go, free and clear,” Koyama replies. “He’s always been partial to TegoMass and this gave him an excuse to make them permanent.”

Sighing, Shige takes off his coat and puts it around Koyama’s shoulders.

Koyama whistles. “Look at Shige all grown up in the sharp suit and tie!”

“Shut up,” Shige grumbles. “Today is my first day off and I came to see you. Are you working here now?”

“Not much else to do,” Koyama answers brightly. “Unlike you, I got my degree for fun, not expecting to actually need to use it someday.”

“I’m sorry-”

“No,” Koyama says firmly, snuggling with Shige’s coat and smiling shyly. “It wasn’t much fun without Shige anyway.”

All of Shige’s frustration seems to melt away at the words. “Do you have time today?” he asks before he knows what he’s going to say.

Koyama peeks in the windows and counts the remaining customers. “It should be okay for a few hours. We have this girl who works part-time, but when it gets close to dinnertime we get pretty busy.”

“A few hours is all I need,” Shige says.

“Then I’m all yours!” Koyama squeals, grinning as he starts to head back inside. “What are we going to do, anyway?”

Shige feels his expression matching Koyama’s. “We’re going to find me an apartment.”

::

“Do it!” Koyama orders, standing with his hands on his hips and pointing at the door. “Do it or we’re not friends anymore.”

“So _dramatic_ ,” Shige huffs, slipping his shoes back on and going out the door only to come right back in. “I’m home!”

“Welcome home!” Koyama cries, his arms wide and gesturing to the absolutely empty apartment. “I’m so glad you decided to get this one.”

Shige kicks off his shoes and considers the travel futon rolled up in the corner. “Next order of business – furniture.”

“Deep, earthy tones would match Shige’s personality,” Koyama says, flopping on the floor. “But not boring – Shige’s not boring.”

Shige raises an eyebrow. “You’re hired.”

“For what?” Koyama asks.

“Interior decorating.” Shige reaches for his wallet and flips his debit card at Koyama. “The pin number’s still on a sticker on the back. I don’t use it enough to have it memorized.”

Koyama’s eyes grow larger as he turns the plastic over and over in his hand. “Shige really trusts me, huh?”

“That and I don’t have time to do it myself.” Shige crosses the room and uses the last of his strength to unroll the futon. “I have a hearing first thing tomorrow morning and the only reason I didn’t sleep at the office is because you would have killed me.”

“Shige is so stressed,” Koyama says as he kneels by Shige’s side and urges him onto his stomach. Strong hands work at his shoulders and he groans shamelessly. “You haven’t had a Koya-massage in awhile!”

He hasn’t. Shige remembers the days when he’d be poured over his books at every possible opportunity, memorizing legal jargon in time to NewS Nippon and falling asleep with his pencil still in hand as he rushed to finish an essay. It seems like lifetimes ago instead of less than a year, the last time being when Shige was cramming for the bar and Ryo was the only one he’d let quiz him because everyone else was too nice.

It was those times when Koyama would stand behind him, hands on his shoulders and casually squeezing the tension away. It was the one thing he did that didn’t annoy Shige, and it was something only Koyama could do because Tegoshi went too fast and it felt like Massu would pop his shoulders right out of their sockets.

“Shige,” Koyama says gently. “Do I have to go home tonight?”

Shige’s half asleep, putty in Koyama’s hands. “You don’t ever have to go home,” he mumbles.

“Shige,” Koyama says again, an excited whisper. “Maybe this could be my home too?”

Shige yawns. “Dammit, I was going to make the second bedroom into an office.”

“If Shige doesn’t want me to-”

“Are you kidding,” Shige says clearly, turning over enough to see Koyama’s face. “If you’re not here to remind me, I’ll forget who I am.”

Koyama’s grin glows in the dark. “Then I’ll stay as long as Shige lets me.”

::

Living with Koyama is kind of like living with his mother all over again, only Koyama makes him eat his breakfast before he leaves the house. That’s on the rare occasion he actually comes home, anyway; he has his own cases now, and if he thought he had a lot of work as assistant council, it’s _nothing_ compared to his load now.

Koyama packs him with lunch _and_ dinner before he leaves the apartment, calls in a half hour to make sure that Shige put them in the refrigerator, and calls at noon and five to remind him to eat. He insists that Shige keep a pillow and blanket at the office for when he sleeps there, along with a box of granola bars for breakfast energy.

He tried to throw a surprise housewarming party with the other members of their old group, but Shige never came home that night. Even Yamapi had made time in his busy schedule and Shige couldn’t. He called – he always calls – and Koyama apologetically faced the other four from the middle of the brightly-patterned living room (a little of Koyama’s personality mixed in with Shige’s).

Tegoshi steamed up the bathroom just to leave Shige a note in the mirror, and Massu made Koyama promise to make Shige eat the muffins he had brought.

Ryo looked like he disapproved of everything that had happened in the last quarter of a year, and if Yamapi could have stayed awake for longer than twenty minutes, he probably would have too.

“Take care of him,” Yamapi said right before they left. “I don’t like what he’s doing, but soon it will be worth it, I think.”

Koyama nodded and hugged them all for a long time.

When Shige hears about this three days later, he falls asleep with wet eyes and wakes up with Koyama’s hair in his face.

::

It takes six months for him to crack. In Koyama’s eyes he’s over the hump, and from now on they can start a countdown to the day where Shige can go work for the prosecutor’s office and not feel like scum everyday. In Shige’s eyes, he has _six more months_ of manipulating the law to let criminals walk and bring home a fat paycheck.

One of the partners of his law firm, an overweight balding man named Takayama, makes him take a second day off, but instead of letting him go home, he invites him along to the strip club. At ten o’clock in the morning on a Tuesday. Shige goes to be polite, pretending to enjoy the naked girls who fawn all over him because of who he’s with, but really he’s wondering if they’ll be done by lunch so he can surprise Koyama at the ramen shop.

“Pick one,” Takayama says, interrupting his thoughts.

“Excuse me?” Shige responds.

“ _Pick one_ ,” Takayama repeats, smiling in a way that makes him feel dirtier than any case he’s ever worked on. “Consider it a bonus.”

_Six more months_. Shige points to a girl at random, a skinny one with narrow eyes, and the last of his innocence disappears in the back room.

He doesn’t go to visit Koyama after all, just goes straight home and spends two hours in the shower, washing the invisible filth from his body as he tries to figure out why he feels so _guilty_.

::

By the time he learns that Koyama has a girlfriend, they’re celebrating their one-month anniversary. Shige finds out the hard way when he ends up coming home really late one night when he had already called and said he’d be sleeping at the office. In his defense, Koyama does have his own _room_ , and it’s really his own fault that Shige walks in on them around the time that Koyama gets to second base.

She takes it really well, shrugging back into her shirt as she introduces herself and ends with, “I’ve heard so much about you!”

Shige vaguely recognizes her as ‘the girl who works part-time at Koyama’s ramen shop’ and briefly wonders how old she is. He doesn’t even realize that he’s been staring until she mumbles something and darts out the door, leaving Koyama a little bewildered and very breathless.

“I’m sorry,” Shige says quickly, cringing as the door closes behind him. “I didn’t know what to say.”

Koyama shakes his head like it’s nothing. “Don’t worry about it. I shouldn’t have brought her here. I’m the one who should be sorry.”

“What are you talking about?” Shige calls out as he loosens his tie on the way to his room to change. “You live here too. I don’t care if you bring girls home.”

He frowns at the attitude in his voice and figures he’s just really tired. It’s past midnight after all. He’s pulling on a T-shirt when he notices Koyama in the door, frowning. “You pay for everything.”

“You _take care_ of everything,” Shige argues. “Besides, we may as well make the most of this dirty money I’m earning and live a nice-”

“It’s not dirty,” Koyama interrupts, folding his arms in dissatisfaction. “Some of the people you defend really are innocent.”

“They’re _all_ innocent,” Shige replies, gesturing grandly in sarcasm. “They didn’t steal any money. They didn’t hurt anybody.” He sighs. “Last week I fucked a stripper my boss bought for me.”

Koyama’s face twitches. “We all have our regrets-”

“It was my first time.” Shige faces Koyama, clenching his fists tightly as he feels himself start to lose his composure. “I lost my virginity to a _whore_.”

“I lost mine to a fangirl,” Koyama replies. “It’s practically the same thing, minus the exchange of money.” He pauses. “It’s not like _you_ paid for her. You probably went along with it because your boss wanted you to, right?”

“Don’t make excuses for me, Kei,” Shige says darkly. “I could have told him no. But I didn’t. I made the choice to fuck her and I enjoyed every minute of it.”

Koyama opens his mouth only to close it. This happens three more times before he finally responds. “That doesn’t make you a bad person, Shige.”

“Then why do I feel so bad?!” Shige screams. “I hate myself _so much_. Between my job and… _that_ and taking advantage of you-”

“You are _not_ taking advantage of me,” Koyama says firmly. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be. And you’re helping me and my family too, did you know? They’re saving money by not having to feed me, but I can still work in the shop for free because I don’t have to have a real job since Shige takes care of me.” He grins. “So it works out, see?”

Shige rubs his eyes. “I feel a little better now.”

“Naoko-chan has a friend,” Koyama says carefully. “If you wanted, I could-”

Shige’s laughter cuts him off. “Kei, I’m barely home, and when I am I’m sleeping. It’s completely unfair to ask any kind of girl to put up with that.” He offers a weak smile. “Happy anniversary, by the way. I’m sorry I messed up your special night.”

“It’s okay,” Koyama replies. “She would have left soon anyway. We’re not _there_ yet.”

“ _There_?” Shige repeats, only about halfway interested as he crawls into bed.

“Sleeping together,” Koyama clarifies. “Not just sex, but sharing a bed. It’s kind of my thing.”

Shige grins into his pillow. “You’ve shared a bed with me plenty of times. Does that mean we’re _there_?”

Another pillow smacks him in the head. “You don’t count.”

Shige laughs for probably the first time in months, so hard that he loses his breath and shakes the mattress with his force of it. “Come on,” he says as he calms down, patting the other half of the bed. “Let’s go to sleep.”

Koyama looks like he wants to say something, but seems to think it better to keep his mouth shut as he crawls under the covers and lets out an amused chuckle.

“I’m too tired to be ashamed of anything right now,” Shige grumbles, rolling onto his stomach and getting comfortable as Koyama’s body heat appears next to him. “Thanks, Kei.”

Koyama automatically begins to rub his back, eliciting soft noises from Shige as he starts to fall asleep. “I feel like I’m _cheating_ ,” Koyama whispers with a giggle.

Shige snorts, but inwardly his heart flops. He knows the feeling.

::

The anniversary of his law school graduation comes and goes, along with Koyama’s birthday. He almost forgets the second one until he looks at a calendar midway through the day, but he’s gotten to the point where he can pawn his work onto other people and utilizes that capability for the first time ever.

The look on Koyama’s face when he walks through the door while the sun’s still up is possibly the happiest he’s ever seen him since the day he passed his bar. “Surprise!” Shige says needlessly. “I don’t have a present, but I’ll take you out and buy you whatever you want.”

“Spoken like a true asshole,” Koyama replies, but he’s still smiling. “I don’t want a present like that, Shige! Today, Shige _is_ my present. And we’re meeting the others for dinner.”

“The others..?” Shige repeats, fingering his collar. He hasn’t seen his ex-bandmates for the better part of a year, and the last time he saw Yamapi wasn’t exactly a good memory.

“You’re going,” Koyama decides for him, putting his hands on his hips as he looks Shige up and down. “Go put on something more… not-lawyery.”

Shige feels like he’s in someone else’s body in jeans as he follows Koyama into the restaurant and immediately gets tackled by Tegoshi. Clearly Tegoshi hasn’t changed at all. Next to Tegoshi’s empty seat, Massu is concentrating intensely on the menu and lighting up the room in his neon-camouflage pants.

Tegoshi’s pulled away by Yamapi, who has probably hugged Shige twice in his life and this makes three, though he’s pretty sure it counts for seven with the way Yamapi’s squeezing him like he’s dying or something. “You’re not dying, are you?” Shige says out loud, taking advantage of his current position to see if Yamapi has lost weight.

“Koyama has rubbed off on you,” Yamapi says brightly, poking Shige in the nose. “I am healthier than I’ve ever been. I could probably bench-press you. Wanna see?”

Shige lets out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. “That’s not necessary.”

“You need a haircut,” Ryo remarks from his seat, eyeing Shige like the cat had just brought him in.

For once, Shige agrees. “I haven’t had time -”

“I’ll get my sister to cut your hair,” Koyama jumps in. “She hasn’t seen our apartment yet, and you haven’t seen Haru-chan in almost a year!”

“I haven’t,” Shige says slowly. “I haven’t even seen my own mother in a long time.”

“Bad Shige!” Tegoshi cries, slapping Shige’s arm several times before Shige cringes and escapes his wrath. “You don’t avoid your mother!”

“Not avoiding!” Shige declares. “I’m busy! And I talk to her on the phone once a week.”

Even Massu shakes his head.

“No excuses,” Yamapi says firmly, always the leader. “Tomorrow you can take ten minutes in your day to stop by and see your mother. Even if you just stay long enough for tea, I’m sure it will make her day.”

“But-” Shige starts. He has a debriefing first thing in the morning and then two meetings, both with the teams for two of his cases, and that’s all before lunch.

“Ten minutes,” Yamapi says again. “Promise me.”

“This is Koyama’s birthday!” Shige exclaims. “Enough talking about me, yeah?”

Yamapi frowns very, very sadly, and Shige feels like he just kicked a puppy.

“… I promise,” he mumbles.

Dinner is filled with chatter and laughter, more reminiscing than present events. It’s probably the first time Shige’s glad that he doesn’t have time to sit and dwell on things, otherwise he’d drive himself crazy missing being around these guys.

“You haven’t seen _anything_?” Ryo asks Shige incredulously. “So you probably don’t know that Uchi was finally reinstated, do you?”

Shige nearly chokes on his food. “He was?! That’s great!”

“You really didn’t know.” Ryo shifts his look to Koyama. “Get him a TV, will you?”

“You could get a little one for your office,” Tegoshi suggests.

“Um, I have a flat-panel on the wall,” Shige admits. “I think it has satellite too.”

“I kept meaning to tell you,” Koyama says apologetically. “I’m sorry, Shige.”

“It’s okay,” Shige says, turning to give his roommate a reassuring smile. “I think I’ve been home four times in the past month anyway. I didn’t even know you had a girlfriend until you had already been together what, a month?”

Yamapi coughs and Tegoshi clears his throat. “Um, we broke up,” Koyama says quietly. “Last month when she started university.”

Massu frowns at both of them. “You two are the worst roommates ever.”

“Broke up?” Shige repeats, gaping. “Are you okay?”

“Of course,” Koyama replies. “She was just a girl.”

Shige’s about to protest, but Koyama’s cell goes off. He looks at the display, makes a face like he doesn’t recognize the number, and answers.

All other activities at the table cease when Koyama shrieks, “Kusano!”

Something in Koyama’s voice doesn’t settle well with Shige, and he concentrates like he’ll be able to hear both sides of their conversation if he tries hard enough. “What? What did you do?”

Kusano is evidently arguing about something, because Koyama rushes to correct himself. “I mean, what did they _accuse_ you-”

That’s enough for Shige. “Kusano,” he says matter-of-factly, snatching the phone out of Koyama’s hand and putting it to his own ear. “It’s Shige. Where are you?”

Kusano’s either hysterical or crying. “Police station. I got arrested, Shige, but I swear I didn’t do it. That stupid ho is lying!”

“Don’t say another word,” Shige orders. “I’m on my way. If anyone asks you anything, tell them your lawyer advised you not to answer any questions.”

Koyama’s face lights up as Shige hangs up and gives him back his phone. “Are you really-”

“Pay for this with my card,” Shige cuts him off. “I’m treating everyone, no arguments -”

“Thanks, Shige!” says Tegoshi, who probably never even thought about arguing.

“I’ll be home late,” Shige goes on, giving Koyama a sad look. “On your birthday, I’m sorry.”

Koyama’s practically crying, shaking his head rapidly. “You taking care of Kusano is so much better than a present. Go! He’s waiting!”

“Can you bring food into jail?” Massu asks worriedly. “You can take him the rest of my dinner.”

“Mine too,” offers Tegoshi.

“He’s not in jail yet,” Shige says as he stands up and shrugs into his jacket. “Depending on what he did, I can probably get him out on bail tonight. I’ll take him straight to my office to plan a defense, and some people owe me some favors so I might be able to move up his hearing.”

Yamapi grabs his arm as he turns to leave. “Do your best,” he says. “I’m counting on you.”

In his hesitance, he’s loaded with three to-go boxes, and he has to tear his eyes away from Yamapi’s before the other uncovers the true reason that Shige’s taking this case.

He needs to prove to himself that there’s _some_ merit left in his job.

::

Kusano has looked worse for wear in his time, three different colors in his hair and brand names on his clothes as he sits across from Shige in the interrogation room, happily munching on Tegoshi and Massu’s leftovers.

“I didn’t even know you were back in the country,” Shige’s saying. “Last I heard you were in New York.”

“Lost its appeal,” Kusano replies calmly, a little too calm for someone who’s being accused of _rape_. “Oh shit, I forgot to tell Koyama ‘happy birthday’.”

“Tell me about this girl,” Shige says, putting on his lawyer face and folding his arms indifferently. “You say she’s your girlfriend?”

“ _Was_ ,” Kusano spits. “Bitch isn’t getting any of this anymore if this is what she’s gonna do when I give it to her.”

“This doesn’t look good, Kusano,” Shige hisses through his teeth. “With these kind of situations, it’s her word versus yours. The partners at my firm will shit kittens when they find out I took on such a high-risk case.”

Kusano chews thoughtfully. “She told me she wanted to have my baby. That’s why we did it without a rubber.”

Shige cringes. The positive rape kit would be in district’s evidence. “Would you consider a plea?”

“Fuck no!” Kusano screams. “What kind of lawyer are you? I’m telling you I didn’t fucking rape her. It was consensual sex between a man and woman.”

It takes all of Shige’s willpower to resist putting his head in his hands. “Do you have any idea why she would set you up?”

“No clue,” Kusano says, deflating a little as he calms down. “I don’t have any money.”

Shige raises an eyebrow at Kusano’s clothes.

“She bought them for me,” he explains. “She’s _loaded_.”

“Her or her parents?” Shige asks as the proverbial light bulb turns on.

Kusano lifts his chin like he’s bragging. “Her daddy’s the dean at Toudai.”

Shige’s head hits the desk. “Shit.”

“You think he found out?” Kusano gasps. “Damn, I’m glad I’m in jail.”

“He found out and she panicked,” Shige speculates. “Chances are she’s going to try and lie about your relationship, so I need you to make a list of anyone who would have seen you two together and clearly in some sort of romance.”

“Easy, she couldn’t keep her hands off of me.” Kusano smirks. “Anything else?”

“Don’t fuck anyone,” Shige says firmly.

“In prison, that’s gonna be hard,” Kusano replies sarcastically.

“I’m getting you released on bail, asshole,” Shige growls. “It’s set higher than my last year’s earnings. If you fuck this up, I’ll own you for the rest of your natural-born life.”

“You live with Kei now, right?” Kusano asks. “That would be okay, I think. He wouldn’t let you be mean to me.”

“Can you be serious for five seconds,” Shige says exasperatedly. “I’m not getting paid for this and I’m already going to get into a fight with my superiors tomorrow over it, so you can at least show your gratitude by not being such a fucking smartass.”

Kusano closes his mouth and leans back in his seat, looking at Shige expectantly.

Shige takes a breath. “If you have sex with anyone, even if you think your ex-girlfriend doesn’t know them, she could find out and have them press false charges too. A pattern gives us _absolutely no defense_. So keep it in your pants.”

“Yes, sir,” Kusano grumbles.

Shige lights another cigarette as he goes over his notes so far. “When was the last time you talked to her?”

“Fucking _yesterday_ ,” Kusano answers. “We didn’t even do it.”

“When are they saying the crime occurred?” Shige asks.

Kusano shrugs. “Dunno. You told me not to talk to anybody so I didn’t. All I know is what I’m accused of, and my rights.”

“I’ll see if they’ll give me the police report,” Shige says, then stands up and walks out to the station area. He doesn’t even try to be polite; they all know his face and his reputation.

One of the fatter police officers makes a big show of finishing his game of Spider Solitaire before printing out the report for Shige. Shige doesn’t even feel bad about the time he made this guy cry on the witness stand as he snatches the paper and skims it as he heads back to the interrogation room.

He’s almost to the door when he sees something that makes him stop dead.

“Kusano,” he says in a hushed voice, almost falling into his folding chair from the force of his excitement. “There’s no way the prosecution has a rape kit. They’re saying it happened _four months ago_.”

“ _What_?” cries Kusano. “Let me see that.”

“You’re not actually supposed to-” but it’s too late, Kusano has already snatched the printout.

And paled considerably. “Shige,” he says quietly. “Did you read this whole thing?”

“You didn’t give me a chance!” Shige exclaims, flattening it on the table and trying to read upside-down. “Why, what does it say?”

“It says she’s pregnant,” Kusano whispers. “Four months along.”

Shige bangs his hands on the table a little too loudly. “This… is so easy.” He blows his bangs out of his face and stares hard at Kusano. “We’re going to win this, Kusa. There’s no way that she won’t get caught up in her lie and break down while being so emotionally susceptible.”

Kusano doesn’t appear to be listening, his attention on the one word. “Why didn’t she tell me? I saw her _yesterday_.”

“My bet is that she found out a little while ago, and today she told her parents and lied in order to not get in trouble with them,” Shige guesses. “That’s why she cried rape.”

“A baby…” Kusano says sadly. “Do you think she’s going to keep it?”

“It’s too late to… um… get rid of it,” Shige says carefully. “Do you want it? After I get this case thrown out, I can probably prove that she’s an unfit mother and get you custody.”

Kusano blinks at him. “You really think I can raise a kid by myself?”

“You _made_ it, didn’t you?” Shige folds his arms. “Besides, you know Koyama will help you. He’s like a baby magnet.”

Kusano nods knowingly, then smacks his hands to his face. “This is so fucked up!”

“Let me worry about the lawyer stuff,” Shige says comfortingly, offering Kusano a friendly smile. “You need to prepare yourself to be a father.”

Another nod, and Kusano’s on his feet. “So I just go, then?”

Shige’s by his side. “Not so fast. With as much as I paid for you, you’re not leaving my sight.”

Kusano’s eyebrows rise. “Let me guess, I’m suddenly best buddies with Koyama until the trial.”

“If there is a trial,” Shige replies. “I give it a week before I get a dismissal. I’m not the biggest scum on the face of the planet for nothing.”

“Do your best,” Kusano says with a giant grin.

Koyama already has the guest futon laid out in his room when Shige and Kusano get back. Kusano blabs every detail of his case in forty-five seconds, and to nobody’s surprise Koyama’s eyes tear up the minute Kusano says the word ‘baby’.

Shige leaves them to it and heaves himself to bed, setting his alarm for three hours ahead when he’ll take the early train and have everything figured out by the time the bigwigs knock down his door to yell at him for taking a rape case.

He might just sleep soundly tonight. He’s halfway there when his door creaks open and someone crawls into his bed.

“Kusano snores,” Koyama says, and Shige snorts. “You’re going to save him, right?”

“Of course I am,” Shige replies. “I’m going to save the _world_.”

> PART THE SECOND

“ _Genius_.”

Shige squints through the steam of his coffee, wondering if he’s lost so much sleep that now he’s delirious. “Come again?”

“You’re a _genius_ , Kato,” Takayama says. “This kind of controversy is just what we need.”

Shige doesn’t know what to say, so he takes a gulp of coffee and nearly burns his mouth.

“You’ve got balls, kid,” Takayama goes on. “But you’re going to need help. Let me be your assistant council.”

Now he chokes. “ _What_?!” Shige squeals, all propriety gone. He thinks about the proposal he spent two hours preparing this morning to state his case to his _boss_ , let alone the judge in the hearing scheduled later today, and he’s a little disappointed that it’s accepted so easily.

“Bitches cry rape so much,” Takayama grumbles. “With your friend, we can scare them all into keeping their fat traps shut.”

It’s not the first time that Shige feels sick, but it hasn’t gotten any easier.

“My firm is going to exploit you,” he tells Kusano on the phone as soon as he gets a chance. “You’re going to be made an example of. If I were you, I’d want to do everything in my power to make sure we _don’t_ go to court. The media will be all over it and the whole nation will watch the trial on CourtTV.”

“I don’t care,” Kusano says, always the stubborn one. “I didn’t do anything wrong, and if you ask me to plea again I’m firing you.”

Shige scoffs. “You can’t fire me, I paid your bail. My assistant council is going to ask you to plea, but he’s an asshole so don’t pay attention to anything he says.”

“Got it,” says Kusano. “Are we done? Koyama and I are shopping for baby shit.”

Shige’s not going to touch that one. “Meet me at the courthouse at three to go over your testimony. Do you have a suit?”

Kusano laughs.

“Okay,” Shige says slowly, covering up his sigh. “Go into my closet and pick one from the left side. The right side is my trial suits and I’ll kill you if you touch them.”

“I don’t think lawyers go around threatening murder on their clients,” Kusano says in a sing-song voice.

“They do when they grew up together,” Shige replies. “Three o’clock. Don’t be late or I’m making you plea.” And he hangs up.

Three of Shige’s cases are handed off to other lawyers for the day, and with one of the partners assisting he spends the day constantly surrounded by paralegals with nothing better to do than run research and look up precedent cases. Shige’s opening speech is pretty much written for him while Takayama drags him to the barber shop and the tailor’s.

“You have to look sharp,” he’s told. “You’re representing my firm.”

With shorter hair and a pinstripe suit, Shige feels more like a pimp than a lawyer as he walks into the courthouse that afternoon. The crowd of people part to let him through, the other lawyers and their clients on recess or waiting for verdicts not holding back their distaste at seeing him. He’s used to it and enters the defense room to find Kusano already there, looking very uncomfortable in one of Shige’s plain grey suits and his hair pulled back.

He’s not alone. “Shige!” Koyama exclaims. “You look so important.”

Shige closes his eyes. “You shouldn’t be here, Kei. Hearings are closed to the public.”

“But I’m testifying!” Koyama says cheerfully. “Kusa said he needed character witnesses.”

“Preferably ones whom he’s interacted with in the past three years,” Shige clarifies.

Kusano looks down. “But Koyama’s the only one who’s willing. The others I called don’t want anything to do with this.”

Koyama frowns. “It’s okay, we don’t need them. Shige’s good at this and he’ll find a way-”

“Hey,” Shige says firmly. “For the next couple hours, I’m your lawyer, not your friend. Please address me properly and hear what I say as _legal_ advice.”

Koyama and Kusano nod slowly. Shige wishes he would have known that Koyama would be a character witness this _morning_ , because now he has to cram six hours of testimony practice into thirty-five minutes.

Takayama shows up five minutes before the hearing is scheduled to start, taking one look at Kusano and whispering, “He looks like a rapist.”

Shige’s given speech crumples in his hand as he makes a fist and squeezes it. Luckily, he won’t be using it.

“That’s good, though,” Takayama goes on. “It will make other potential clients think that they have a better chance of getting off. After we win this, business is going to _boom_ , and you’ll get the fattest raise ever.”

“Thanks,” Shige says dryly. “He didn’t do it, though.”

“They never do it,” Takayama replies with a chuckle. “Don’t you know by now that their innocence doesn’t matter? It’s how much evidence the prosecution has. I don’t even _see_ the plaintiff here, which will probably get this case automatically dismissed. Good job.”

Shige’s head turns towards the other side of the room. He sees the same asshole prosecutor he’s always up against – good sign – and the dean of Tokyo University. Shige recognizes him from the newspaper and literary magazines. No wife, no assistant council, and most importantly no daughter.

The Honorable Judge Tsukamoto takes his seat at exactly four o’clock. Shige’s never stood before him before, but apparently Takayama has if the giant smirk on his face is any indication. Shige doesn’t think his boss would be above getting a dirty judge, or anything else dirty really. Takayama wasn’t kidding when he said that this isn’t about Kusano at all – he’s just the unlucky person who gets to be a pawn.

“This hearing is postponed until the plaintiff is out of the hospital,” Tsukamoto announces.

Kusano squeaks, but Shige purposefully kicks him in the leg as he remains standing. “Defense requests medical records of this event,” he says clearly. “And rescheduling for the day she is released.”

“Granted,” Tsukamoto says.

“Well, that was anti-climatic,” Kusano says as Shige leads him out of the courtroom. “I got all dressed up for nothing.”

“Don’t worry, you get to do it again.” Shige leans against the wall and nudges the prosecutor as he comes out. “Oh, excuse me – hey, Fukushima-san, how have you been?”

“Back off, Kato,” Fukushima says. “I have nothing to say to you.”

“Why don’t you just give up?” Shige asks him in his best patronizing voice. “You have no case. You’re wasting my client’s time, and yours – doesn’t she want her baby’s father by her side as she gives birth?”

“There will be no giving birth if she’s in the hospital much longer,” Fukushima says. “She was taken there because of complications, and the parents are hoping for a miscarriage.”

Kusano gasps and starts to say something, but Shige’s hand is automatically on his mouth. “That’s inhumane. You’ll go to hell for that.”

“That’s funny, you telling someone else that.” Fukushima gives a short laugh. “Rape babies don’t get the same chances that normal babies do. She doesn’t want to be reminded of that awful night for the rest of her life.”

“Wasn’t _that_ awful,” Kusano mumbles into Shige’s hand.

“It’s okay if you want to embarrass yourself in front of me,” Shige tells Fukushima. “It won’t be the first time, but I’ll enjoy it just the same.”

The exchange is over as the prosecutor walks away with his nose in the air, and Shige turns around to see Koyama looking shocked, like he just saw a ghost or something equivalent.

Shige’s lawyer face falls and he’s wracked with tingles of guilt. “Kei -”

“Let’s go, Kusa,” Koyama says sternly, staring at Shige in disbelief. “We should leave _Kato-sensei_ to his work.”

Kusano shrugs out of Shige’s grasp and follows Koyama out the door, neither one looking back.

“Marital problems?” Takayama jokes, nudging Shige in the arm. “Your wife’s a real looker.”

Shige prides himself in not punching him.

::

Tanaka Yuki is released the next morning, still pregnant. Thankfully.

“I’m so glad,” Kusano breathes in relief, once again dressed up and preparing for the hearing that has been rescheduled for eleven a.m. Koyama’s in the witness room, blatantly avoiding Shige.

“Hi,” Shige says to Yuki, pretending like he’s waiting for her to finish at the water fountain. “I heard you were in the hospital. Are you feeling okay?”

“Don’t talk to him,” Fukushima calls from down the hall, jogging to guide her away. “He’s trying to set your rapist free.”

Yuki starts crying.

“Oh, she’s good,” Shige says.

“You’re scum,” Fukushima spits before he leaves.

Shige salutes him and once again leads Kusano into the courtroom. Takayama is almost asleep in the next chair, and Shige considers nudging him until he’s passed some papers. They’re the medical records he requested, which he skims through as he waits for the judge to arrive. Yuki was hospitalized for exhaustion that caused her to ‘fall’; he pushes it aside to worry about after the rape charges get dropped.

Fukushima had to be a preacher in a previous life with the way he gives his opening statements, sucking everyone in to feel sympathy towards his client no matter what. He’s going to _prove_ beyond the _shadow_ of a _doubt_ that the defendant _brutally raped_ his client in _passionate fury_. Shige almost smiles until he sees Kusano gripping the table tight enough for his knuckles to turn white.

“Your Honor,” Shige begins when it’s his turn. “This entire case is one person’s word against another’s. The prosecution has no hard evidence other than that the plaintiff is pregnant with my client’s child, which was the result of consensual intercourse with intent to conceive by two adults in a relationship _four months ago_. If this goes to trial, it will be a waste of money and time for all involved. If my client is guilty of anything, it’s believing that the daughter of a prestigious university dean would actually be in love with him.”

Takayama looks pleased as Shige bows and returns to the bench. He only sits down for a second before Tsukamoto calls the end of the hearing and returns to his chambers to make a decision.

“I didn’t get to testify,” Koyama says sadly.

“Nobody got to testify,” Shige tells him. “This is a good thing. It means that Tsukamoto doesn’t care to hear it because he’s already made up his mind.”

Koyama pretends not to hear him.

Fifteen minutes later, Shige’s phone goes off. Quick decision.

They herd back into the courtroom at the same time Tsukamoto returns.

“After careful consideration,” he says, “I’ve decided to hear the case. Trial will commence in one month on June third.”

Shige gapes, but Takayama is chuckling. “Alright! Press coverage nationwide. Are you ready for this, young Kato?”

He thinks it doesn’t matter whether he’s ready or not – it’s _happening_ , and he feels completely out of control.

::

It’s only a day late, but it still counts as keeping his promise to Yamapi when he shows up at his parents’ house just in time for dinner, pretending that everything is okay for a few more hours before his world turns upside-down.

“I’m going to be on the news starting next month,” he tells them calmly. “I have a very high-risk case.”

“Murder?” his father asks excitedly.

“Rape,” he replies, and his parents fall silent.

“Well, do your best,” his mother finally says. “If Shigeaki says the guy didn’t do it, he didn’t do it.”

It occurs to Shige right then that this is probably the first time he’s defending someone because he actually believes in their innocence. “He didn’t do it,” he says firmly.

“Then my baby will get him a not-guilty!” Shige-mama exclaims.

Shige nods to himself. “I have to,” he says under his breath.

::

It takes Koyama a week to speak to him, but only because it takes that long for Shige to come home. He has a _team_ of people keeping late hours for this case, but Shige’s not about to leave everything in their hands and insists on being around to supervise. The other lawyers speak of Kusano like he’s just another guilty client and Shige lets it go; guilty or innocent, with this case, the defense is the same. There’s no reason to throw a tantrum about something that’s going to change their focus.

There are, however, no women on the team. There’s not really many in the firm to begin with, just a couple of hard bitches who handle the nasty custody battles and sometimes murder cases but won’t touch a rape. Shige doesn’t blame them; if it wasn’t Kusano, he probably wouldn’t have touched it either.

By the time he finally walks through his own front door, he’s actually mad at Koyama for having the nerve to judge him by how he has to act at work. “Kei,” he says calmly, poking at the man hanging off the couch. “Wake up, I have to talk to you.”

Koyama grumbles something and looks up. He sees who it is and rolls right back over. “Talk.”

“I don’t have to explain myself to you,” Shige begins. “You know what my job is. It’s obvious what kind of person I have to be to do it. I’m sorry that you had to see it, I really am, but if you’re just going to add to the list of things that make me feel guilty about it, go ahead and leave.”

Koyama doesn’t move. “You were so mean to that other lawyer,” he says. “I didn’t think Shige could be like that.”

“Kei.” Shige reaches for his shoulder, gently urges him to lie on his back and face him. “Everything I do, I’m doing it for Kusano. To prove his innocence. The prosecution is used to these kind of cases going for plea, so they’re pressing on as long as they can in hopes that my side will give in before trial. It’s like a game of Chicken, really.”

“So you need them to give in first?” Koyama asks. “That’s why you treat him like that?”

“Yes,” Shige answers firmly. “This should not have gone to trial. If it does, it’s her word against his, and with a baby involved it will probably go in her favor. And the prosecution knows that. By me being cocky, it makes him wonder if I don’t have evidence of my own, something concrete like a videotape of their very consensual intercourse.”

Koyama makes a face. “You… you don’t have that, do you?”

“Not exactly,” Shige responds. “Kusano mentioned something about a pool table at a friend’s party, so I have people being tracked down about that, but you know how it is with rape, Kei. I could prove that she’s lying about their relationship and probably everything else, but if she says she didn’t consent on _one night_ , there’s still a case. She’s lost credibility, sure, but even hookers have a right to say no.”

“I don’t understand why people lie,” Koyama says in a small voice. “Kusano would have taken care of her and helped raise the baby even if her parents didn’t approve. He’s that kind of person when there are so many who won’t be.”

“That’s another thing,” Shige goes on. “If he’s found guilty of rape, he loses all paternal rights to the child. Even if she’s guilty of perjury for everything else.”

“That’s not fair,” Koyama mumbles. “The law is supposed to protect people.”

Shige kneels by the couch and leans his head on Koyama’s shoulder. When he doesn’t get nudged away, he keeps speaking. “This is what I went to school for, Kei. This is why I tried so hard and studied so much. The law applies to _everyone_ and it’s my job to bend it towards my clients, the ones who need it. I’m doing my best and I’ll continue to do so, with or without your approval.”

“Oh, shut up,” Koyama says playfully. “I’m not going anywhere.” He rolls over so that he’s now using Shige as a pillow. “I didn’t stick by your side this long just to up and leave because I don’t like how you have to act. I was just wondering…”

“What?” Shige asks, feeling Koyama’s hesitant breath on his throat.

“Would you behave the same way if it wasn’t Kusano?” Koyama inquires softly. “If it was someone whose guilt you weren’t sure of? If you weren’t positive that the girl wasn’t raped for real, would you still play mind games and call her a liar?”

“I wouldn’t have taken the case if I wasn’t one-hundred-percent sure of my client’s innocence,” Shige tells him. “Is this interrogation over?”

“Yes,” says Koyama, and Shige can feel him smiling. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you in front of your boss.”

Shige smirks. “Actually, he thought ‘my wife’ was a ‘real looker’.”

Koyama chokes on his laughter, nearly falling off of the couch completely. “Keep me away from him, Kato-sensei,” he says in a high-pitched voice. “I don’t like fat, sleazy lawyers.”

“Good thing I’m not fat then,” Shige says in amusement.

“If you’re not careful, you’ll get there,” Koyama replies, poking at Shige’s stomach. “When was the last time you worked out?”

“When was the last time I slept for more than four hours?” Shige shoots back, covering his stomach protectively. “All of my clothes still fit just fine!”

Koyama’s giggles appear to be attacking him as he struggles to stay on the couch. “You can sleep for more than four hours tonight, can’t you?”

“Nope,” Shige says regretfully. “I only left the brats alone so I could talk to you. I might spend the next three weeks at the office.”

“Well,” says Koyama brightly. “Nothing else to do but take a nap, then. Come on.”

“‘Come on’… where?” Shige asks uncertainly, just in time to be pulled down on top of Koyama. “Kei! I can’t sleep here. What’s wrong with my bed?”

“Too far,” Koyama mumbles, shifting Shige until he fits perfectly in his arms. Shige’s head is on Koyama’s collarbone and he can clearly hear his heartbeat. “Okay?”

Shige’s already falling asleep. Koyama chuckles and strokes his hair, squeezing Shige as tightly as he dares until his head leans against Shige’s and he follows him in slumber.

Kusano gets up to have a cigarette around daybreak and makes a face at the two twisted together on the couch. “This is worse than walking in on your parents having sex,” he mumbles to himself, but really, he’s not surprised.

::

Defense witnesses always go first, and despite his team’s hard work, Shige only had Koyama and Kusano to take the stand when the trial start date finally comes. His examination of both went fairly well, in his opinion, although he made his co-council take Koyama so it didn’t look too familiar. The prosecution opted not to cross-examine Koyama, which Shige was very grateful for but also a little worried. Character witnesses are very important in he-said/she-said cases, and normally the opposing council would take the opportunity to badger one.

As for Kusano, Shige made it crystal clear to the court that Kusano and the plaintiff were in a relationship for seven months, speaking of marriage and children at the time of the alleged rape. He met her at a party last fall and they’d hit it off. He didn’t even know who her father was until around Christmastime when he took her to meet his mom.

“How many times would you say you’ve had consensual intercourse with the plaintiff?” Shige asks.

“Over a hundred,” Kusano answers promptly.

Shige stops pacing abruptly. “Non-consensual?”

“ _Zero_ ,” Kusano says firmly.

“Your witness,” Shige tells Fukushima, resisting the urge to kick his chair as he walks by. It wouldn’t be very professional of him, but this entire case was ludicrous and a big fat waste of everybody’s time. The crowd of spectators and media guys would probably thank him for the entertainment.

“You claim my client was your girlfriend?” Fukushima asks Kusano, pacing the floor much like Shige had done – acting.

“There’s no claim about it, she _was_ ,” Kusano says fiercely.

Shige hides a smile.

“How come you never met her parents?”

Kusano shrugs. “She never asked.”

“But she met yours, on Christmas?”

“Yes. She met my mother.”

“Your mother who won’t come and testify on your behalf?”

“Objection,” Shige says lazily. “My client’s mother has been subpoenaed and will be sending in her written testimony being as she is overseas and unable to return at this time.”

“Sustained,” says Tsukamoto. “The testimony of the defendant’s mother will be considered upon its arrival.”

Shige’s starting to get bored, and a sideglance to his co-council shows him staring off into space. He wonders how long it’s been since Takayama has actually been an assistant. He’s been partner for at least fifteen years, and as a partner he only takes on the cases he wants. He has a harem of lawyers below him – Shige included – to take the mundane bitch work.

“You hit her once, didn’t you?”

Shige’s head snaps up just in time to see Kusano squirm. “It was an accident,” he says.

“Shit,” Takayama whispers, and Shige agrees. This is brand new information to both of them.

“You were drunk and you smacked her across the face,” Fukushima goes on. “Because she wouldn’t go to a party with you?”

“That’s not what happened,” Kusano says slowly. “I tripped and swung out my arms, getting her in the face by _accident_.”

“Were you drunk?”

Kusano exhales noisily. “Yes. But so was she.”

“She’s eighteen.”

“I was seventeen when I got suspended for drinking,” Kusano replies. “All you have to do is Google my name to find proof of that.”

“Objection!” Takayama calls out. “Relevance?”

Shige almost laughs as the prosecutor turns around and fixes them with an incredulous look. “You don’t see the relevance in proving a pattern of abuse in a rape case?”

“I was referring to the underage drinking,” Takayama says in a very slow, calm voice, like he’s speaking to a five-year-old. “With no blood tests for this particular night, nobody can prove anybody’s drunkenness, and I would like it stricken from the record that my client was intoxicated on the night of the accidental smack since there has been no accusation of intoxication on the night of the alleged rape and therefore no need to prove any kind of drinking _pattern_. Whether my client was drunk or not at any age is completely irrelevant.”

“Sustained,” Tsukamoto says, and Shige’s jaw nearly drops. Definitely a dirty judge. “Council, if you have any relevant questions to ask the defendant, please do so.”

“You used to be an idol, right?” Fukushima says to Kusano. “With Johnny’s. Both of you, actually.” He gestures to Shige as well.

Shige opens his mouth, but Tsukamoto beats him to it. “I don’t believe the defense council’s previous occupation has anything to do with this case, Council.”

Kusano looks highly amused. “I used to be an idol, yes.”

“It must have been easy to get girls, huh?”

“You could say that.”

Fukushima paces some more. “It must have been tough when you got suspended.”

“Not really,” Kusano says. “Girls love me.”

“How many girls would you say you’ve had sex with?”

“Objection!” Shige and Takayama yell at the same time, although Shige is not surprised to see that Kusano has his mouth halfway open to actually answer the question.

“I’ll allow it,” Tsukamoto says, leaving Shige not so sure about the dirty part anymore.

“I’ll gladly answer,” Kusano says with a smile. “Eighty-seven.”

Takayama whistles, along with somebody behind them in the seats.

“Were they all while you were in Johnny’s?” Fukushima asks.

“No,” Kusano replies. “A majority of them were while I was in New York, actually. I’ve probably only been with twenty Japanese girls.”

“‘Only’,” Shige snorts, and Takayama chuckles.

“Out of those twenty,” Fukushima starts, “how many were before you were suspended?”

“ _Suspended_?” Kusano repeats. “Seven. There was a considerable amount of time between while I was suspended and when I was let go completely, though. There were twelve during that time, and after that was when I went to New York. I met Yuki-chan right after I came back last summer, and she’s been the only one since.” He pauses. “I don’t know what kind of point you’re trying to make, Fukushima-sensei, but would you mind getting to it? I have to pee.”

Shige chokes from trying to keep his laughter down and masterfully covers it with a cough.

“Clearly this court is in need of a recess,” Tsukamoto announces. “Fifteen minutes, then we will continue with the cross-examination of the defendant.”

Shige makes it all the way outside and completely hidden by a tree before he falls apart. “You are _amazing_ ,” he tells Kusano as they light up their smokes.

“You damn kids run too damn fast!” Takayama is calling from the courtyard, breaking a sweat from trying to keep up with them.

They both ignore him. “I needed to talk to you!” Kusano exclaims. “I don’t know how to answer his questions. He doesn’t even ask questions, really. He just makes assumptive statements and asks for my agreement.”

“That’s his style,” Shige says. “I’ve been against him many times. He’s not very fond of me.” He pauses and turns to face Kusano directly. “ _Oh_ , I almost forgot!”

“Wha-?” Kusano starts, being cut short when Shige slugs him in the arm. “Ow! What was that for?”

“You _hit_ her?” Shige hisses. “This is the kind of shit we need to know about!”

“It was an accident!” Kusano cries.

“It doesn’t matter,” Takayama interrupts softly. “It makes us look bad.” He leans over to Shige. “You probably shouldn’t beat on your client in broad daylight, either.”

Shige flushes. “Sorry.”

“The media’s not allowed to film on recess anyway,” Takayama says with a sigh, then looks at Kusano. “Kid, if you want us to help you, we need to know _everything_ that’s happened between you two. Even the bad stuff. Because trust me, Fukushima’s going to bring it up.”

“I’ve yelled at her,” Kusano admits quickly. “She always yelled at me first, but I yelled back. You know how I am, Shi- I mean, Kato-sensei.”

“Did you ever yell during sex?” Shige asks.

“Not in a bad way,” Kusano replies with a smirk.

Shige closes his eyes and shakes his head. Takayama chuckles and claps his hand on Kusano’s shoulder. “Physical stuff. Shoving, throwing things, anything that would show a pattern of _violence_.”

Kusano’s eyes dart to the side, and Shige knows that he’s seriously thinking about it. “No,” he finally says. “Not at all. That was the only time I ever lifted a hand to her, and it was an _accident_.”

Takayama grins. “Then we should have nothing to worry about, right? It’s in the bag.”

Kusano looks considerably happier as they head back into the courtroom, but Shige can’t help but wonder why his co-council is so confident.

::

Kusano’s cross-examination lasts _six hours_. By the time Fukushima’s prompted to wrap it up for the third time, the whole court and anyone else who’s watching knows Kusano’s entire sexual history, how long he usually lasts in bed, and a recreation of all dialogue exchanged on the night in question.

All of which Kusano had provided _cheerfully_.

“If he was trying to embarrass me, he didn’t do a very good job,” Kusano says as they leave the courthouse. “My father’s watching CourtTV right now going, ‘That’s my boy!'”

“I honestly have no idea what point he was trying to make,” Shige says, more to himself than to Kusano, and a sideglance to Takayama shows the same opinion. “ _I_ could have cross-examined you better than that!”

“Only ’cause you know all of my dirty secrets,” Kusano sings, poking Shige in the ear. “Besides, Shi- I mean, Kato-sensei is the best lawyer ever and you could probably make me, an innocent man, look guilty beyond the shadow of a doubt in anyone’s eyes.” He wiggles his eyebrows at Shige. “I’m really glad you’re on my side.”

Shige starts to retort, but thinks better of it. It’s probably in everyone’s best interest that Kusano stays in high spirits, even if Shige has a sneaking suspicion that something not-very-legal is going on.

“He was buying time,” Takayama tells him later, when they’re alone in Shige’s office with take-out and beer. “He’s at a loss just like we are, and he was scrambling for anything that would give him any way to incriminate Kusano at _anything_. Just to make him look like the kind of person who would force himself on his girlfriend.” He chuckles. “And driving you crazy in the process. That was probably an added plus.”

“I hate that guy,” Shige mumbles. “I don’t think I would like him even if I had become a prosecutor.”

“It’s more fun on this side,” Takayama tells him, offering his can for a toast. Shige accepts indifferently. “Also, and this was probably the main intent, cross-examining Kusano until the very end means that the girl won’t take the stand until tomorrow.”

Shige pauses with his chopsticks halfway to his mouth. “They don’t have any other witnesses?”

Takayama polishes off his beer. “Nope. Not a one.”

“No character witnesses?” Shige squeaks. “Family, doctors, some random person who walked by the house and heard screaming?”

Chuckling, Takayama drops his empty can and container in the trash and shrugs back into his blazer. “Probably couldn’t get anyone else to lie for her.” He yawns and heads for the door. “I don’t need to stay here and tell you how to cross-examine her, right?”

“No, sir,” Shige replies. “I could do it in my sleep.”

“Good.” And with that, he leaves Shige’s office.

Shige’s pretty sure his is the only light in the whole building. He considers going home, getting a full night’s sleep since it’s only nine and he has to do absolutely nothing to do to prepare for court tomorrow. It doesn’t pride him, but his specialty is making witnesses trip over their words to the point where it looks like they’re lying even if they aren’t. Since Tanaka Yuki is definitely lying, he won’t even have to try.

The only thing he has to worry about is whether he can look Koyama in the eye after it’s all said and done.

::

“Kei,” Shige says softly. “If I asked you not to watch my cross-examination tomorrow, would you listen?”

“Nope,” Koyama replies, his face a little muffled from the pillow. “I know you’re going to be an asshole to that girl. I’m ready for it.”

“Do you know the _extent_ to which-”

“It’s okay,” Koyama interrupts him. “It’s okay because it’s for Kusano.”

Shige sighs. “I really don’t want you to see it.”

“Too bad.” Koyama chuckles and rolls over, lying against Shige’s back. “Everyone is talking like this will be the best part. I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

“What are people saying?” Shige asks carefully. “I mean, if you happen to have overheard-”

“Do you want me to spy for you?” Koyama asks, sounding excited. “I totally will. I can linger around that girl’s father and see if I can get any dirt.”

“Oh no, I’ve corrupted you too,” Shige mumbles. “Unless I can get her to admit it, it probably won’t help.”

“I’ll do it anyway,” Koyama says. “I have nothing better to do while you and Kusa are conspiring on break.”

Shige laughs. “Thanks, Kei.”

“Anything for Kusano,” Koyama whispers as he falls asleep.

Despite it being ‘in the bag’, Shige is still uneasy. So much for a full night’s sleep.

::

Predictably, the prosecution’s examination of Tanaka Yuki takes until lunch.

Just as predictably, Koyama is in tears.

Shige shakes his head and gives him a lawyer-hug around the shoulders. “Go home, Kei.”

“No,” Koyama says sternly. “I’ll be okay, I just feel really sorry for that girl.”

Kusano kicks him under the table. “What, do you think I did it now?”

“Of course not!”

“Kei,” Shige says slowly, “you feel sorry for her because Fukushima is a mindfucker. She wanted to have a baby, she got pregnant, and the father is actually happy about it – what is there to pity?”

“She has to be perfect for her father,” Koyama answers. “What she wants doesn’t matter. Did you ever consider the possibility that he’s making her lie?”

Takayama looks up from his food, giving Koyama his full attention.

“Did you hear something-” Shige starts.

“No.” Koyama stares at his plate. “It’s just that Kusa’s not stupid about his girlfriends. Remember? He used to be able to tell who wanted into Yamapi’s pants for his fame and who actually wanted to get to know the man behind the pretty face. And having a baby is something serious, not something to be decided lightly or in the heat of the moment, and Kusa’s not stupid enough to do either.”

“You give me more credit than I really deserve,” Kusano mumbles.

“What I’m trying to say,” Koyama goes on, “is that Yuki-chan probably was genuinely in love with Kusano, even up until the day he was arrested. The day she told her father she was pregnant.”

Kusano plays with his food. “That actually makes a lot of sense. I never could understand why she would just turn on me like that.”

Shige stands up, the remaining half of his lunch abandoned. “I have to go. I’ll see you in court.”

Ignoring the calls after him, including his own co-council, Shige runs across the courtyard and halfway down the street until he reaches the library. They’re not going to have what he wants, but he looks anyway. Calls the office, has his minions look too. For anything, any kind of precedent.

Nothing.

He strides back to the courthouse, more determined than before. If there isn’t a precedent, he’ll just have to make one.

::

“Please describe to the court your relationship with my client.”

“He was a friend,” Yuki says, leaning forward into the microphone to show that she’s timid. She was coached very well.

“What kind of friend?” Shige pushes. “A party friend? A sex friend? A boyfriend?”

“None of those,” Yuki says with a frown. “He was a mutual friend of someone I went to school with.”

“Where is this mutual friend now?” Shige asks. “Why isn’t she here?”

“We’re not friends anymore,” she says slowly.

Shige leans against his own bench. “When did you stop being friends?”

“Last summer, I think,” Yuki replies. “I haven’t thought about her in awhile. I’m not exactly sure.”

“Were you still in school?” Shige asks. “Were you still in summer uniform?”

“… Yes,” she says slowly. “Yes, I think it was summer.”

Shige blinks. “You said in your testimony this morning that you met my client in October of last year.”

“That’s right,” she says.

“Yet the mutual friend who introduced you disappeared from your life before then.”

“Well, maybe it wasn’t summer then,” Yuki says testily. “You’re confusing me.”

“I am?” Shige says, feigning shock. “I apologize, Tanaka-san. Let’s talk about something else. You’re eighteen years old, fresh out of high school. What are your plans?”

“I’ve enrolled at my father’s university,” Yuki replies, sounding a little haughty. “I’m a freshman.”

“A pregnant freshman,” Shige corrects. “Are you going to continue to go to classes when you start showing?”

She looks down. “No.”

He leans down in front of her and looks her in the eye. “This baby messed up your life, didn’t it?”

“Objection!” Fukushima yells.

Shige waves his hand before Tsukamoto can rule. “I’ll rephrase. Are your plans for the future different than before because of your child?”

“Clearly they are,” Yuki snaps. “I just told you I won’t be going to class anymore.”

“You fell down about a month ago,” Shige moves on. “Our first hearing was rescheduled because of it. Do you remember that?”

Her mouth twitches. “Yes.”

“How did you fall?”

“Objection!” Fukushima declares. “Relevance?”

“Give me three questions, I’ll show you your relevance,” Shige tells him without turning around.

“You’ve got three questions, Council,” says Tsukamoto.

“One – how did you fall?” Shige repeats.

“I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs,” Yuki says testily. “It’s in the medical report you demanded. Didn’t you read it?”

“That report stated that you tripped and fell down a flight of stairs,” Shige agrees, “but when I saw you the next day, your face was unharmed.” He clears his throat. “Two – what direction were you facing when you tripped?”

“Forward?” Yuki replies. “I don’t understand what you’re asking me.”

Shige frowns on purpose. “You couldn’t have been facing forward, because then you would have banged up at least something visible on your face. My client, as a matter of fact, did something like that when he was thirteen and nearly broke his nose. Maybe he told you?” He waves his hand. “Wait, don’t answer that, that’s not my third question.”

“I guess I could have fallen to the side,” Yuki says, looking helplessly at her lawyer. “I don’t really remember, though. Do you remember every single detail of what happens right before something traumatic?”

“Falling was traumatic,” Shige repeats, resisting the urge to bring his voice up at the end and make it a question. “I’m sure it was, considering that baby you really want to keep.”

“Objec-”

“Three,” Shige interrupts him. “Who was with you right before you fell?”

“My father,” Yuki answers.

Shige smiles. “Thank you. I have no further questions, Your Honor.”

There’s a collective gasp throughout the room, including his co-council. “Are you sure, Kato-sensei?” Tsukamoto prompts. “This is the last witness.”

“Actually, if the prosecution is resting, the defense would like to call one more.” Shige leans against his bench and looks at Fukushima expectantly.

“Prosecution rests,” Fukushima says, sounding a little bewildered.

Tsukamoto turns to Shige. “Well?”

Shige inhales audibly. “Defense calls Tanaka Ryosuke-san to the stand.”

“What?!” Yuki’s father booms, standing up and speaking for the first time. “I refuse to! My little girl’s been raped and-”

“Tanaka-san!” Fukushima says loudly, trying to calm the older man down. “Please give me a minute, okay? Just a minute.” He turns to gape at Shige as the Toudai dean returns to his seat and folds his arms very unhappily.

“I’ll agree to a recess for the prosecution to prep my witness,” Shige says with a smirk. “But I’m telling you now, you might want to concede.”

Fukushima stares at him as Tsukamoto announces a twenty-minute recess. “ _What do you know_ ,” he hisses.

Shige leans over into his face. “If you weren’t so hell-bent on your conviction, you’d know what I know and we’d be having a completely different trial.”

::

Takayama catches up with him in the courtyard, huffing and running as fast as his legs would carry him. “You better have a good damn reason -”

“He pushed her,” Shige interrupts, turning around and stopping Takayama in his tracks. “The bastard pushed his pregnant daughter down the stairs.”

“Who, the dean?” Takayama asks. “Are you shitting me?”

“Koyama was right.” Shige’s borderline hysterical, staring unseeingly at the world around him as the puzzle pieces itself together right in front of his eyes. “She didn’t lie at all, at least to him. She probably stood up for Kusano, told her father that he’s a good man. _He_ cried rape to justify disposing of the baby.”

“ _What_?!” three voices exclaim, and Shige blinks to see that Kusano and Koyama have joined them.

“I’ll fucking kill him,” Kusano growls, and Koyama grabs him by the arms.

“Abortions are only allowed up to three months after conception,” Shige thinks out loud. “Unless it’s result of rape.”

“And when it looked like the prosecution had no case,” Takayama jumps in, “he pushed her down the stairs as insurance.”

“He doesn’t care about Kusano at all,” Shige finishes up. “He cares about his daughter being pregnant and ruining her life and their family’s reputation.”

“Well, fuck him,” Kusano spits. “You’re going to take him down, right Shige? Get him to admit to it and then I’m off the hook, right? _Right_?”

Shige exchanges a glance with Takayama. “Right.”

Takayama nods. “What should we do?”

Shige bites his lip in thought. “The noble thing to do would be to tell Fukushima what we’ve figured out and give him a chance to do the right thing.”

“Which is to drop the charges,” Kusano clarifies.

“Yes,” Shige says. “He’d drop the charges on you and file new ones against Yuki’s father. If he was smart, he’d also file a restraining order against him on Yuki’s behalf and find a safe place for her to stay since her mother doesn’t seem to be in the picture.”

“She never talked about her mother,” Kusano says. “I thought she had died or something.”

“She’s alive,” Takayama speaks up. “The report says she has both of her parents.”

“And the not-so-noble thing..?” Koyama asks slowly.

Shige doesn’t meet his eyes. “Say nothing and embarrass him in the middle of court on live TV.”

Koyama takes a step closer to Shige. “Does Fukushima-sensei really deserve that? _He_ didn’t push anyone down the stairs, I’m sure.”

“A prosecutor’s job is to uphold justice,” Shige recites. “To convict the right man.”

“He’s not out to get you,” Koyama says softly. “Maybe it won’t be as exciting if the charges get dropped quietly, but a blatant humiliation for the _government_ attorney’s office doesn’t reflect well on _any_ of us, or our unity as a nation.” He blinks and puts a hand on Shige’s shoulder. “It won’t be a big win for your firm, but you might sleep better at night.”

“Dammit,” Takayama mutters. “Your wife is right, Kato.”

“Of course he is,” Shige says, flashing Koyama a grateful grin as he sheds his ‘lawyer pants’ right there. “I’ll go talk to Fukushima right now.”

“I am so proud of you,” Koyama says.

Shige stares at him for a beat, then turns back towards the courthouse, particularly the prosecution room.

Fukushima isn’t surprised to see him, but he’s still a dick. “I’ll only talk to you in judge’s chambers.”

“Fair enough,” Shige says. “Let’s go.”

Tsukamoto isn’t surprised to see them either. “What’s going on here?” he asks, sounding a lot less business-like than when he’s presiding. “I thought this was a rape case.”

Shige glances at Fukushima, who nods for Shige to go ahead. “Your Honor,” Shige begins, “the defense has reason to believe that Tanaka Ryosuke is forcing his daughter to lie in order to be allowed a second-trimester abortion in accordance with a rape conviction.”

Now Shige’s the one who’s surprised when no one bats an eye.

“The prosecution has reason to believe that as well,” Fukushima adds. “As council for Tanaka Yuki, _not_ Tanaka Ryosuke, the prosecution hereby drops the charges against Kusano Hironori and ask that this case be dismissed.”

“Granted,” Tsukamoto agrees. “Shall I issue a warrant for Tanaka Ryosuke-san?”

Fukushima laughs a little uncomfortably. “The _dean_ of _Tokyo University_ ,” he says under his breath. “How am I supposed to convict him of… whatever this is? It’s unprecedented!”

“Calm down,” Shige tells him. “Just because it’s unprecedented doesn’t mean that you can’t make a precedent yourself.” He offers a smile. “If it makes you feel any better, I won’t be representing him.”

Fukushima laughs for real, shaking his head at Shige. “How long until you come to our side?”

“Four months and counting,” Shige replies. “Get my desk ready, will you?”

“Sure thing,” Fukushima plays along. “Right after you tell me what the hell I’m supposed to do here.”

> PART THE BONUS

“What was your relationship with the deceased, Fujimoto-san?”

“She was my wife,” the man replies. “I loved her.”

“You loved her so much that you upped her life insurance?” Shige asks, shuffling some papers in his hands like he was looking for something. “To nearly twice as much as it was previously. Two weeks later she was murdered.”

“I didn’t do it,” Fujimoto says desperately, looking at Shige with pleading eyes.

“Of course you didn’t,” Shige says. “That would be too obvious.”

“Objection!”

“Sorry, sorry.” Shige pushes his glasses up his nose and turns to look at Fujimoto again. “You have connections with the yakuza, don’t you?”

“I wouldn’t call them ‘connections’,” Fujimoto says. “I’ve done business with them, yes.”

“The kind of business where you owe them money?” Shige prods.

“Yes.”

“I bet the insurance settlement would help with that,” Shige mutters.

“Objection!”

“ _Council_ ,” the judge says incredulously.

“Sorry,” Shige says again. “I used to be a defense attorney.”

There’s a snort of laughter behind him from his co-council. Shige will have to teach Fukushima how to contain his amusement in court.

::

“Shige’s acting has gotten better,” Tegoshi comments.

Shige raises an eyebrow. “What are you talking about? I haven’t acted in years.”

Yamapi presents him with a pair of big ass sunglasses and a straw hat at lightning speed. He puts them on, along with his unimpressed face. “Look familiar?”

Koyama cracks up. “Shige, you had some fans in court today!”

“Oh, hell,” Shige says, feeling his cheeks heat up. “You should have seen me when I was defending.”

“When you were defending, nobody got to see much of you,” Massu points out.

“Including me,” adds Koyama, like he’s more important or something. Being as he has every single one of Shige’s keys duplicated on his key ring, including the key to his office and the cherry red convertible parked outside, he probably is.

“You’ve gotten cocky,” Ryo says, glaring at Shige. “I don’t like it.”

“Too bad,” replies Shige, sticking out his tongue.

Uchi laughs. “Some things never change. Right, Ryo-chan?”

Ryo ignores him and focuses on Kusano’s girlfriend’s very large belly. “Your daddy used to wear sparkles and feathers.”

Yuki flicks him in the forehead.

From the other side of her, Kusano leans over and lowers his voice. “Uncle Ryo-chan _still_ wears sparkles and feathers.”

Ryo grins stupidly at being called ‘uncle’. Uchi and Tegoshi point and laugh at him.

“It’s so nice to have everyone here!” Koyama squeals. “It’s been so long since the eight of us have been together.”

“I never thought Kusano-Man would reproduce,” Yamapi says, frowning at Yuki. “You have my sympathy, Yuki-chan.”

“Thanks,” she replies dryly.

Kusano pokes her in the arm. She slugs him back and nearly shoves him off of the chair.

“DV!” Kusano squeals.

“I like her,” Ryo says to no one in particular.

When she gasps, Massu’s the first one to notice, and he nearly knocks his chair over when he jumps up and runs across the table. “Yuki-chan?”

Pandemonium follows, including three different people searching for the emergency hospital bag before Yuki smacks them all in the head with it while doing her Lamaze breathing.

Koyama’s doing it as well, gripping onto his seatbelt as Shige calmly drives behind Massu’s soccer-mom van. “You act like you’re having the damn baby,” Shige comments.

Koyama laughs and catches his breath. “It may as well be ours.”

Shige knows that he means _all_ of theirs, but he has to say it anyway. “Kei, we’re not _there_ yet.”

::

It’s a little difficult to fit four people on a loveseat, and the only reason they manage is because one of them is a very tiny person. Baby Ayumi gurgles happily from her place on Koyama’s belly, making spit bubbles that her father keeps having to wipe up.

“Aw look, she spits just like her daddy,” Koyama says, grinning harder when Kusano gives him a dirty look.

Shige laughs, earning a shoulder nudge from Kusano. Koyama’s stretched out across both of their laps and jerks from the motion. “Stop rocking the boat!” he exclaims, tightening his hold on Ayumi as he turns his attention back to the TV. “Shh, they’re about to start!”

Shige covers Koyama’s eyes just to be a brat, but Koyama bites at his fingers and he snatches them back as the beginning of this year’s Countdown starts on his TV. They see Yamapi, then Ryo and Uchi with Kanjani8, and finally Tegoshi and Massu all on separate parts of the stage.

“See that?” Kusano whispers to his daughter. “Daddy knows _all_ of those guys.”

Ayumi blows a raspberry at him.

“I don’t think she’s very impressed,” observes Koyama.

Kusano blows a raspberry at him.

Both Ayumi and Koyama are asleep by the time midnight rolls around, and Kusano isn’t very far off. “Do you think we could crash here tonight?” he mumbles as he situates his head on Shige’s shoulder. “I’m so _tired_.”

“Because _your_ life is so hard,” Shige teases him, then pokes Koyama. “Yours too.”

“Hmm?” Koyama says in his sleep, snuggling with Shige’s knee.

“My life _is_ hard,” Kusano tells Shige as they split the duties of hauling the others to bed. “I have a baby, which automatically trumps being a lawyer.”

“You have help,” Shige points out.

“So do you,” Kusano shoots back.

Shige hoists Koyama over his shoulder and sighs. “I need to get a bigger place.”

“Yes, you do.” Kusano yawns as he fixes Ayumi in her baby seat and carries her to the guest bedroom. When he opens the door, he laughs. “Finally turned it into an office, huh?”

“May as well,” Shige replies, the corners of his mouth curling up in amusement. “Nobody’s using it.”

“I don’t want to hear about that shit,” Kusano calls over his shoulder. “Happy New Year, turds.”

“Happy New Year, brat,” Shige replies. “Try not to get into any trouble next year.”

“I’ll try,” Kusano says. “But I can’t guarantee that trouble won’t find me.”

Shige deposits Koyama in their bed and pokes his head back out the door. “If it does, I know a good lawyer.”


End file.
